11/11/11 – 9:27 P.M. – Riding On A Bicycle Down A Dark Street
It was a cool night, the moon was posted up through the trees and I was just getting off of work. I was so tired as I made my way through the neighborhood cruising my way own one of my easy routes home. It was ninety-percent all down hill which was even better because I just wanted to listen to my iPod and rest in my thoughts for a moment.
As I approached a cross street I failed to see if a car was coming and to my sudden surprise, I found myself staring at two beaming lights heading towards me from the side. In my mind I thought that if I could just peddle harder I could beat the car and I thought that I did when I leaped to the opposite side of the street. The car came to a screeching halt when I felt my bike jerk to the side. Once my body decided to sliding, I felt it would be a good time to try to stand. I felt no pain so I assumed everything was alright. I began to lift myself up and my leg bent abnormally letting me know that I wasn’t going to be walking home that night.
The driver ran from what looked like a black jeep SUV. He looked scared and asked me if I were okay. I think I was in a state of shock or perhaps I still in customer service because I smiled politely and cracked a joke about my leg being broken. Naturally he didn’t believe me because who laughs during these kinds of situations. Me of course, humor is my coping mechanism I guess. Finally I showed him my dangling leg and the detached bone. He started to panic as he attempted to call the police and seemed to be having a very hard time doing so.
Since I was the more calm and collected one I reached into my bike basket and called 911 for myself.
11/11/11 – 11:38 P.M – Baylor Hospital – ICU Room
So there I was in ICU waiting to be transported to my room and out of the corner of my eye I see a man waking towards me. It was a police officer with a note book in hand. He began to question me and I thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until he began to accuse me of stealing the bicycle that I was riding. I was beyond furious at the accusation and the timing. I told him that I had nothing else to say to him. I was not in the mood for his shenanigans and he left the room never to be seen again.
I guess the shock was running off or perhaps it was my annoyance with the police officer, but I was finally starting to feel pain. I found out that I what I was experiencing is what happens when you’re body is in shock. It was a fascinating experience and the rising pain was getting old real-quick.
11/15/11 – 10:34 AM – At home in bed staring up at the ceiling
It’s my birthday and here I was stuck in bed with a broken leg. Well, a healing leg that now has a new titanium feature in the bone. The pain was insufferable and the pain medication they gave me to take was giving weird pink elephant delusions so I stopped taking them. I was more than willing to deal with the pain. Pain that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
As I was laying there, it all finally hit me. I could have died that night. I could have been paying attention and not being reckless. Why didn’t I stop at that stop sign. I became hysterical as I started to yell in frustration. I thought that I was alone in my apartment so I felt comfortable crying and letting out my despair. After a few moments, I noticed a head poke it’s way into my doorway. It was my roommate who looked wide eyed and scared. I was so mortified when it became apparent that I was not alone and my very human melt down was being witnessed.
I’m not usually someone that likes to display my emotions in front of people like that. I’ve had years of practice when it comes to suppressing my emotions. But for the first time in my adult life, someone was witnessing my true human form in his teary eyed and snotty nosed glory. She came into my room, her eyes wet with tears and she just took me in her arms and just held me. It really meant a lot to me and it was really what I needed in that moment. The best birthday gift I could have ever received.
6 Years Later
The road to recovery hasn’t been easy at all but I was determined to literally get back on my feet. I was up walking without support about 6 months after the accident. I still have occasional pains but it’s mostly because I haven’t strengthened that leg as much as I should have. I notice that I hesitate when it comes to doing leg strengthening activities because I don’t know my limits and for a while I was unwilling to find out my limits.
The doctor told me that I wasn’t going to break it but for some reason that assurance didn’t fill me with much confidence. This makes me regret not looking into professional rehabilitation, I feel like the professional guidance would’ve given me the confidence to push myself. But all of that changes now as I embark on pursing one of my life long desires to learn how to dance professionally.